Near cardiac arrest

I received this pleasant e-mail from my school's registrar a couple of days ago:

Dear Michael,

I am in the process of certifying students for graduation. In reviewing your schedule I see that you currently do not have enough credits to graduate. You are (4) weeks short. Before I can notify the Charles River Campus of your eligibility you need to add these final weeks. Once this has been done I will change your record so you can update your graduation information. If you are having difficulty or are planning on not graduating in May please let me know

After a temporary loss of vision, I picked myself from the floor and sent this reply:

There must be a mistake - were my resesarch credits included in the
calculation? I should have one 6-week block of research included in
there per agreement with the MD/PhD program. By my count I should be 2
weeks over the requirement.

Translation:

I spent FIVE freaking years in graduate school purgatory, and you want to quibble over: FOUR. FREAKING. WEEKS?!

?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!

Her reply:

Whoops.

*******

Ain't nothing stopping this train from reaching Graduation Station, BABY!!!!!