As Dry as the Desert
Friday, May 27th
9:00 am: I turn on the hot water to wash my cast iron skillet. This skillet will make my egg-white omelet. No problems noted.
9:15 am: I've made some jasmine tea. The omelet is done cooking. I sit to break my fast. No problems noted.
9:25-10:14 am: I check email and delete about 20 spam messages. Do my morning tour of friends' blogs. Read the news. Same old, same old. Politics as usual in our nation's capital.
10:15 am: I get up to wash dishes. All I get from the faucet is...a gurgle, then hissing of air. I saunter off to the bathroom, just to see if, by some miracle of plumbing, there is still water available to other areas of my apartment. This time, the faucet elicits no gurgle. Yep, the water is really dead.
10:19 am: I check the foyer area, where management usually slips notices to me of imminent water shut-offs. Nothing. Perhaps Armageddon has finally happened, and it happened somewhere between 9:30 and 10:15 on Friday, May 27th, 2005.
10:23 am: I turn on the TV to check disaster reports. Nothing. Infomercials and re-runs loop on all channels. Oh no. The unthinkable has happened, and our civilization is coming to an end. Thank goodness Blogspot is still up.
10:24 am: I can't even brush my teeth. I feel the bacterial film start to form on the surfaces of my mouth. What will I die of first: dehydration or massive sepsis of the mouth?
10:25 am: Just in case, I check to see that I'm wearing clean underwear.
10:26 am: The unwashed dishes in the sink are starting to emit some rotting smell. This will be the smell of the end of the world as we know it: DEATH - with the occasional waft of dirty dishes.
10:30 am: My mouth is dry. Thus it begins...to end. It begins to end.
10:37 am: I sneak up to the faucet and quickly jostle the handle. Perhaps I could trick the water to coming back on. No dice.
10:38 am: My vision starts to blur. I'll now have to trust the Blogspot spellchecker function to proof this post.
10:39 am: Vision deteriorates to black. Muscles are going into their final - spastic - contractions.
10:45 am: This is it. The end. With my last breath...I.....die. (And hit the 'Publish Post' button).
9:00 am: I turn on the hot water to wash my cast iron skillet. This skillet will make my egg-white omelet. No problems noted.
9:15 am: I've made some jasmine tea. The omelet is done cooking. I sit to break my fast. No problems noted.
9:25-10:14 am: I check email and delete about 20 spam messages. Do my morning tour of friends' blogs. Read the news. Same old, same old. Politics as usual in our nation's capital.
10:15 am: I get up to wash dishes. All I get from the faucet is...a gurgle, then hissing of air. I saunter off to the bathroom, just to see if, by some miracle of plumbing, there is still water available to other areas of my apartment. This time, the faucet elicits no gurgle. Yep, the water is really dead.
10:19 am: I check the foyer area, where management usually slips notices to me of imminent water shut-offs. Nothing. Perhaps Armageddon has finally happened, and it happened somewhere between 9:30 and 10:15 on Friday, May 27th, 2005.
10:23 am: I turn on the TV to check disaster reports. Nothing. Infomercials and re-runs loop on all channels. Oh no. The unthinkable has happened, and our civilization is coming to an end. Thank goodness Blogspot is still up.
10:24 am: I can't even brush my teeth. I feel the bacterial film start to form on the surfaces of my mouth. What will I die of first: dehydration or massive sepsis of the mouth?
10:25 am: Just in case, I check to see that I'm wearing clean underwear.
10:26 am: The unwashed dishes in the sink are starting to emit some rotting smell. This will be the smell of the end of the world as we know it: DEATH - with the occasional waft of dirty dishes.
10:30 am: My mouth is dry. Thus it begins...to end. It begins to end.
10:37 am: I sneak up to the faucet and quickly jostle the handle. Perhaps I could trick the water to coming back on. No dice.
10:38 am: My vision starts to blur. I'll now have to trust the Blogspot spellchecker function to proof this post.
10:39 am: Vision deteriorates to black. Muscles are going into their final - spastic - contractions.
10:45 am: This is it. The end. With my last breath...I.....die. (And hit the 'Publish Post' button).
posted by Mikey at 10:16 AM
1 Comments:
Got water?
If you need a shower (and it's likely you do - stinkpot) Squinty and I have agua a'plenty we're willing to share. For a price.
Post a Comment
<< Home